Dizi Gui (Standards for Being a Good Student and Child) is a traditional Chinese textbook for children that teaches children morals and proper etiquette.
Dizi Gui (弟子规) states that we should respect seniority and always put ourselves at our elders’ service, and that we should address our elders by proper salutations but not their given names. This is in accord with ancient Chinese etiquette. We should be humble and never show off our ability and knowledge in front of our elders.
The famous ancient calligrapher Wang XianZhi and Han Dynasty founding hero Zhang Liang famously respected their elders in their youths. They learned to be humble and hence acquired knowledge and skills from their elders.
Wang XianZhi (王獻之) Learned Calligraphy
Renowned calligrapher Wang Xizhi (王羲之), known as the Sage of Calligraphy in China, lived during the Jin Dynasty (303–361 A.D.) and had seven children, among whom his youngest son, Wang Xianzhi (王獻之), (344-386 A.D.) was also a distinguished calligrapher.
By the time Xianzhi was 15 years old, he had already achieved a great level of skill in calligraphy and often received praise from his father and other elders. Xianzhi hence became arrogant and lazy, thinking that his ability was already excellent and that he no longer needed to put in the effort to work hard and improve himself.
There is a story about how Wang Xizhi helped his son realise the foolishness of his arrogance, and the importance of diligence in order to achieve his ambition. One day, Wang Xizhi was summoned to the capital and his family held a farewell dinner for him. Fine food and wine were served at the feast. While slightly intoxicated, Wang Xizhi had a sudden inspiration to write some words of wisdom as guidance for Xianzhi.
Wang Xizhi wrote a poem on the wall called “Precepts Against Arrogance” (戒驕詩), advising Xianzhi not to be arrogant but to work hard. Xianzhi, however, was not convinced in his heart. Instead, he copied the poem dozens of times each day, and just before his father returned home, he erased the poem when no one was looking and rewrote it in the same location on the wall, imitating his father’s calligraphy.
Xianzhi was very proud of himself. In his arrogance, he thought his calligraphy was just as good as his father’s and that no one would be able to tell the difference.
When Wang Xizhi came home, he looked intently at the poem on the wall for a long time, then scratched his head and sighed.“Could I have drunk too much wine that night, to have written such clumsy characters?” he exclaimed.
His son instantly blushed, feeling deeply uneasy and ashamed. Wang Xianzhi finally realized that only through diligent study and hard work could he eventually become a renowned calligrapher.
Zhang Liang puts shoes on for the old man
Zhang Liang (around 262 – 189 B.C.), courtesy name Zhifang, was born in Han Kingdom (located around what is now the centre of Henan province, to the southeast of Shanxi province). In order to avoid the chaos of war, his family moved to Nayang in Henan and then moved to the Pei Kingdom. Later on, he settled down in Pei Kingdom and became a citizen there.
In Zhang Liang’s childhood, on a windy, snowy winter day, he happened upon Yishui Bridge in the town of Xiapi. There he met an old man wearing a yellow shirt and a black hood. The old man threw one of his shoes down to the bridge on purpose and said to Zhang Liang: “Little boy, please go to pick my shoe back up for me.” Zhang Liang did not hesitate. Regardless of the danger of slipping into the river and being exposed to the cold wind, he went down to the bridge and picked up the shoe for the old man. The old man did not take the shoe, but offered his foot to Zhang Liang and asked him to put the shoe on for him. Zhang Liang did not mind and respectfully did what the old man told him to do. The old man smiled and said: “Boy, I see much promise in you. Come here tomorrow morning and I will teach you some things.”
The next day, before the crack of dawn, Zhang Liang came to the bridge and saw that the old man was already there. The old man said: “You came here later than me. I cannot teach you the Tao today.” It happened like this three times. The third time, Zhang Liang finally got to the bridge earlier than the old man. The old man finally gave Zhang Liang a book and said: “When you fully understand this book, you will be able to serve as the chief military counsellor for a king in the future. If you need my help in the future, come to see me. I am the yellow stone at the foot of the Gucheng Mountain.”
Zhang Liang went back home and he studied the book very hard and finally mastered its essence. He was able to understand all of its intricacy and became very familiar with military tactics. Later, he assisted Liu Bang, the first emperor of the Han dynasty, to found the Han dynasty and unite China.
